Move Along, Move Along, Just to make it through...

I didn't make the cut.

I cut my teeth in the restaurant biz waiting tables at Landry's this past summer. It was a brutal place for a first waiting job, and to make things worse I knew nothing about restaurants. I was held to a much higher standard than almost any other place I could have gotten a job at. There was little room for rookie mistakes, and I made quite a few of them trying to survive in that snake pit.

We were expected to basically take care of anything that wasn't managerial or involved actually cooking the food. I put up with shitty customers, some who stiffed me where it wasn't called for, some who complained about stuff that had no standing to begin with, some who lied to my higher-ups to get some stuff knocked off the bill. I put up with some pretty downright dickheaded managers and co-workers too.

But ultimately, my experiences there solidified my foundations as a waiter, and that alone was worth it. One of the last things my GM said to me before I left was, "You won't have trouble finding work almost anywhere else, after working here." I also made some of the best friends I have today, I gained valuable advice about waiting and life in general, and I grew as a person in ways I didn't see coming. Through the fire and flames, I was addicted to waiting.

So, when I moved back to Austin, naturally I looked for jobs as quickly as I could.

I had spent almost every day of the first month of the semester looking for a spot waiting tables in a fancy-pants restaurant downtown. 4 days out of the week, I'd rush home at 2 after classes ended, throw off my clothes and slap on business pro attire, and drive downtown to hit up restaurants. Even after going to more than 30 restaurants (many of them I went to multiple times) and getting no-calls from all of them, I kept my head up. Just one place, that's all I need, I kept repeating to myself.

Eventually though, I didn't have time to juggle everything, and I had to put job-hunting on hold.

Fast forward to last week.

I was back on the prowl again, hoping that some places still had a few openings before the busy season was fully underway. I knew what I was doing wrong before that was driving away managers, and I had fixed it in my resumé. After hitting up 10 places, I finally caught a break. McCormick & Schmick's, a semi-fine dining seafood and steak place, needed a couple of waiters. I knew if I got a job there, I would never have trouble paying for tuition, renting, anything anymore. I threw everything I had at them, application, resumé, even talked to every manager I could find.

They sat me down immediately for an interview. I kicked ass, as I normally do. They seemed immensely interested in me, and wanted a second interview the next day, Friday. Things looked up for the first time in months. I couldn't believe I was moving along so quickly, after so long.

That night, I was looking on Craigslist for more places to apply at, in case M&S didn't work out. In the flurry of 'wanted' postings, I saw an ad for McCormick & Schmick's saying they needed a waiter. It was posted half an hour after I had gotten back home. I didn't think much of it at the time. I already had my first interview done, and my second interview the next day. Screw the rest.

I spent that night, and the entire next morning getting ready for my second interview. That shit had to be airtight. I wanted to walk out of that place with a job in my hands, and I made sure I would do everything to make that happen. Hours and hours of preparation went into making sure every aspect was covered.

Then the interview with the M&S general manager came. He told me I gave an excellent interview. I felt differently. Maybe this is my perfectionist side of sales technique speaking, but when I walked out I didn't feel as if I had done everything I absolutely could have done to sell myself. I was still too vague, too idealist, and not specific enough to tie my answers back to what I could offer him. To be fair, his questions were too general in themselves to allow me to get real in-depth anyway, but I knew I could have done more, and I loathed that feeling.

Richard the GM told me he'd get back to me by that evening or the next morning to let me know about his hiring decision, although he warned it might take as long as Monday. There were 4 or 5 other people who had interviewed that day, after all, and in the 24 hours since the Craigslist ad had been put up, they had received over 30 applications. Nobody had been offered a job straight up. I remained optimistic that they would hire me; there were no red flags and they had already said they were very interested. And only 6 people at most were interviewed, right?

Wrong. I didn't get a single call. I endured the weekend in agony, tortured over the "what if's" and "maybe's". I called my references and made sure they knew they might get a call. After talking to them on Sunday, they said they still hadn't been called. It seemed like hoping against hope. Nevertheless, I was patient.

Monday came and I had to know. I dressed up, went downtown, and asked to speak to Enrique, the first manager who had interviewed me. He was busy, so I had to wait a while.

At the host's station, I overheard the staff talking about some of the new hires. Some of them were straight up terrible. One apparently was lost throughout training, even into his second week, and had trouble pre-bussing his table. That's unacceptable in the restaurant business, especially at that level. It's like going into honors Multivariable Calculus at UT without knowing how to work a derivative. You just can't have that and expect to get anywhere.

I shared a story with them about one new hire I knew at Landry's who went through the same thing, and in the end it seemed like she had BSed her way through the interview. She was always lost and in the weeds, and one busy Friday night, it all caught up to her and she straight up walked out on us, with her 5 tables already in the weeds. It looked like this guy was doing the same thing. They agreed.

When Enrique finally showed up, he gave me the spill. Richard had already made his calls on Friday night and hired not two, but three people. Obviously, I wasn't one of them.

But why?

Heartbroken, I listened numbly as he said my interview was fantastic, my application was solid and I shouldn't change a thing about it. It just came down to the numbers, and although I was great, those 3 were better. "After all," he mentioned, "after we put up that Craigslist ad, we interviewed a total of 15 or 16 more people, not just you. "

Huh? What happened to 5 or 6?

"You applied at a bad time," he continued. "You were so high up in our consideration."

I shot the shit with him for a few more minutes, but I had heard enough. For the first time in my life, Craigslist had actually fucked me over royally. I couldn't believe it all came crashing down to this.

It was a long bike ride home. I kept cursing and kicking myself, and I couldn't keep my head straight. I was so mad and disappointed and insulted, all at once. I almost ran into a few cars because my thoughts were just all over the place.

I went to the only place that could give me consolation at that time: Chipotle. I ate my heart out and simmered there, letting myself come together again. An hour later, I finally left, very much more at peace, and of course, very much full.

The take-home message: I shouldn't let myself suffer because of an outcome that was largely outside of my control. I can't sweat the circumstances. I wish I could have given it my all, despite what others may have told me, but I know myself and I know what to do better next time. The puzzle pieces of life fall as they may, and sometimes they refuse to fit at one place so that others may come together later. My time will come. Now, I will get back to gearing up for finals, and after I'm done kicking ass there, I'll be back downtown, to take what's mine.